Leadership: Build a network and you’ll never be lonely

Hello KSKOers

You may remember my ranty blog from February 2024. If you’re finding leadership a lonely place, you’re just doing it wrong. Well, now felt like a good time to reiterate my rant and add that developing a network and finding your tribe is a critical way to ensure you’re never, ever lonely. Join me as I share my thoughts on the criticality of connection and the essentiality of allies.

Looking forward to joining you on your learning journey!

What I said in 2024 still stands. Lonely leaders are those that aren’t connecting with their stakeholders and are ineffective in including others in decision making.

This is what I said 2 years ago. It’s still relevant and applicable 2 years later.

group of professional people at a breakfast network, chatting with teas and coffees and pastries on little plates. Brand colours navy and gold

I often see the meme ‘leadership is a lonely place’ and have to bite my lip. Or sit on my keyboard-ready hands. ‘In what context might leadership be lonely?’, is the question I always ask myself, and usually come back to the same answer…

“If you’re a leader of people and you’re feeling lonely, you’re just doing it wrong.”

The days of leaders boxing themselves in to ivory pigeon holes in the penthouse of the shiny glass coup are thankfully behind us – or at least for those who’ve smelt the coffee that’s been brewing for the last 5 years. Leadership is no longer about the cult of leader and no longer symbolised by the hero at the top of the pyramid. Today, leadership isn’t about knowing all of the things and making all of the decisions.

Leadership is about inclusion, nurturing, empowering and delegating. The activity and practice of leadership mean taking an anti-loneliness approach to leading and inviting people in, or better still, inviting yourself over to theirs. Leading is now about being the sheep-dog that takes care of those in their charge not the wolf-pack leader that takes charge of those in their care. To be a an effective leader you must surround ourself with your people and your stakeholders, because you can’t be a leader in an empty room. That’s just self-mastery.

If a leader’s behaviour perpetuates strategic level disconnect from organisational- and stakeholder-others, they’re missing an essential element of modern day leader effectiveness: inclusive decision making. When you don’t include others in pinning down problems, solution ideation and formulating implementation strategies, you’re doomed to feel loneliness and an incredible pressure to be the thinker, option appraiser and decision maker.

And the workforce of today simply won’t stand for it either. They want inclusion at every level and those that aren’t included are quietly slipping out the door and quitting the outdated notions of those looking backward in favour of those looking forward.

A lonely leader is an exclusive leader, leading an organisation to obsolescence. Be an inclusive leader that leads from the front with vision and leads from the back with self-awareness.

Within an organisation, leaders should be cultivating conversations that share problems. That’s the best way to tap into the hive mind and develop good solutions. Cognitive diversity is one of the key components that